Sunday, 10 August 2014

That friend.

I am that friend. That friend that you always invite to go somewhere with a large group of other friends and I can never come. And because I can't come, I expect you to stop your plans and either schedule another date to do it or just never do it. 
Unfair.
I know.
But life's unfair. And at that moment I do not want you to be sharing an enjoyable and fun filled time, full of loving memories to look back on when your old, when I have to babysit. Or do chores. Or homework. Or actually interact with my family *insert over the top shudder here*.
However, I am aware that this is cruel and I should just accept life and move on. 
But I can't. So I will just have to learn to deal with my deep emotional loneliness and jealously with the help of Ben and Jerrys ice cream and lots of peanut butter and Starbucks. Because I am a stereotypical teenage girl. Other than the fact that I hate Nutella.
YES THAT'S RIGHT.
I.
HATE.
NUTELLA.
So after dropping that bomb. 
I shall leave you all.
Or you know. 
The one of you that actually follows this blog.
Forever alone.
Goodbye.

My summer holiday.

So I went in holiday!!!! And I decided it would be a really great idea to do a few water sports... Which, thinking back was a strange thing for me to think about since most of the time I have a phobia of moving. I'm sure we all suffer with it at times.
Anyway, so one of these activities I did was windsurfing or wind sailing or something... As you can see, I'm an expert.
There was one problem though. There was waves. And falling in. And hot instructors. And small, not very sturdy bikinis.
Add all this together and you have me flashing my private parts to a full beach and a sexy instructor, often.
Not my highest point I have to say.
This literally happened about 10 times... Per lesson.
And there was 5 lessons, so there was a lot of stuff on display.
Now, I don't really deal with this type of situation very well, so instead of doing the normal person thing and adjusting myself and then acting like it never happened, I decided to make it know to the whole beach.
 By shouting "OMG, YOU DIDN'T SEE THAT DID U?!?!? MY TITS JUST HUNG WILD AND FREE!!! HOW EMBARRASSING!" 
So...this isn't exactly the way I would recommend you deal with things like this, it's safe to say I got a fair few funny looks and a new instructor after that little accident.
One thing you must understand is that I go through these things so that you don't have to. I'm like a little test dummy, just working out all the things you should never really do or say. You can thank me later :) 
So once again, it's departure time.
I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me.
We should just go our separate ways for a while.
See how it goes.
Goodbye.

Sooo...I'm back... Yay?

Okay. I know, I was so determined on my first post and I had full confidence in the fact that I was going to post regularly... Clearly that has not gone so well.
To be perfectly honest I completely forgot I even had a blog for a long time. Dedicated, I know.
HOWEVER!!! I shall succeed in posting more! It's the summer holidays for me at the moment so I have a lot of time to write and post (which is kind of sad because it just shows how my social life is not quite the most active thing in the world) 
ANYWAY... I'm sorry I've been so hugely failing at this whole thingy, I'm gonna try harder :) 
Right.
Bye then.
It's time for us to part ways.
Temporarily.
Okay, goodbye.
For now :)